Monday 30 March 2020

A Letter.

Almost always 'someone else' comes into our lives more important than the previous ones and people drift apart. Priorities shift and slowly we resign to the ‘fact’.It always comes almost full circle from complete strangers to being ‘obsessed’ with the company to virtually strangers again. They say that the trick is to make most of the situation, cherish every moment and make it count. But that's not how our story should end. I don't want to be a chapter in your book.
                                                 I want to co author it. 15 years from now, when you‘ll stumble upon our pictures, I want your kids to know who the man in the picture is. You are my once in lifetime kind of person and I won‘t give up on you but that's a two way street. I'LL meet you halfway and I hope you‘ll be there. I want you to promise we won't get lost in transition. I want you to promise that won‘t shrink until we go out of focus. We won't be 'in it' again but I promise I'll look back on my life or write it back I'll always cherish you.
                                           It's 3 in the morning and I'm hit by an emotional deluge never experienced before. There is that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, lump in my throat welled up eyes and all I could hope is things will be the way they are. We won't resign ourselves or our ‘relation' to the new people we'll meet. I know how idiotic it is of me to write these cliché but when all the goodbyes of your life, clustered as one is about to hit you, You talk cliche.
                           

Let's put smile on that face. It's highly likely that you are almost teary by now. But that‘s the worst thing I could do to you. You know what, when I look at you, I do not see your body or the colour of your skin; I do not care about the makeup on your face, or the sheer lack of it. I do not care as to what you appear for that matter. I'm not even sure of the extent that I could go for that one smile. I do not know how you fake easily to people about little things affecting you, things bothering you. Those smiles you dutifully plaster around people. The glow which fades as soon as you leave people you love. That apparently happy world you live in. That’s not what interests me. I look for something still deeper. I look for meaning in all the meaninglessness of this world. I peep inside to get a glimpse of your life: steal a little of your smiles, tears and tensions maybe. I eavesdrop on random conversations, get into useless random conversations just to know what amazing story it is that you are unfolding. I notice the minute details of your expressions when you talk to me, I admire the depth of your eyes as I stare right through them, I respect your honesty when you slowly open up and amuse myself when you try to fake it. For when I look at you, I see a soul— pure, raw and naked. I see the story you’re writing, the battles you’re fighting, the smiles you’re smiling, the tears you’re crying and that, is what makes you so beautiful and unique. You’re a hero. You’re a masterpiece. And that's all there is. Now that I will be away here is something I always wanted to tell you. Well, surely there will be days when I'll not be around and you will need someone to vent it out, without the fear of being judged.
                                            I know how strong a girl you are but, every now and then you need someone to remind you that. I saw you being your own hero when everyone else was trying to save themselves. But, don't suffer behind that veil of standing strong everytime, because I know that you do. I know you don't easily tell people about little things bothering you, I also know that you how over think every petty issues to create problems which never existed in the first place. And that's what make you different!